If this doesn't warrant some chatting time, I don't know what will.

Turnip: Ok so I see that you've looked at my profile...we've served our missions in the same country. It looks like that's not gonna do it.

Here's one more...I used to work for -----. I sold -----. I was in the thick of it all when it was going down.

If this doesn't warrant some chatting time, I don't know what will.

Anyway...lots to talk about...lol.

It must be destiny, my dear Turnip, DESTINY.  I'm not sure why I didn't see it before.  Serving missions in the same country and possibly working in the same industry means that we should get together. Wait... you forgot that we are both single too.  Usually that's the first, and only, criteria people use to warrant the blind date hook up.  You gave me TWO MORE reasons.  "Lots to talk about."  I'm not sure I need anything else. Wait... I can you explain the use of lol at the end?  I'm perplexed.  Should I be laughing at the reasons you gave for us to get together?

Destiny bound,

Ardi-K

watsup grandma

Dogmeat: watsup grandma

Like my sister in Zion, JKP, this potential suitor must be related to Horsemeat.  You can read about him here.  This was all he wrote, and it wasn't even in the body of the email.  It was all in the subject line.  Dogmeat lists his age as 91 so luckily I'm not looking for a grandpa.  Apparently he's looking for a great-great-grandma instead of my special awesomeness which is 75 years younger than him (give or take some years in there).

Looking in my century,
Ardi-K

You Can Always Delete Me... But You Won;t:)

Cheeze-It:

<link>

check the link above How sweet of him to think of using a YouTube video to try to plead his case and help jog my apparently faulty memory. [The hyperlink was deactivated to preserve the anonymity of Cheeze-It.]

this is me... I'm on FBook Cheeze-It..

Since I have tried for a year with you... ;) [Lest you think I'm a horrible person for not responding to him for a WHOLE year, see my response below.]

Ardi-K:  Really, are you sure you've emailed me before? I don't remember your pictures or your profile...

Cheeze-It:  I'm pretty sure... check me out on fbook... Check, check.  Sorry, Cheeze-It, I don't remember you. At. All.

You can always delete me... but you won;t:) Did the Spirit confirm this for you? You say it with such assurity.   

Cheeze-It

Gentle Whisperings,
Ardi-K

"are you a true trojan?"

Horsemeat:  "are you a true trojan?"


That's all he wrote folks.  What does a girl say to an "email" that consists of one stupid question that could go multiple nasty directions?  And the only man who can get away with skipping capitalization is e.e. cummings...who never would have asked a girl such a naughty question.

-JKP

Jani- young men should NOT be writing these kinds of things, and especially to YOU!  My spirit is mortified.

Hitch Hiking Around America with my Dog

Ritz Crackers: Ardi-K I loved your profile. It pulled me in and cracked me up. So where all have you been? And I was soooo hoping you were going to say... "So where have you been all my life?"  I have been to a few places but under the guise of surfing. Then can you really surf or do you just pretend so you can travel to surf locations?  Because if you really can surf, I would LOVE to learn.  I would love to travel more, but road trips I do do. Behind the Zion Curtain, we consider road trips traveling too.  The best thing about road trips is conversation, absolutely no conversation, How can conversation and no conversation BOTH be favorites?  and the greasy diners.  Anyway you seem like a lot of fun and I hope you write back soon.
Good hunting, I need to catch a husband?  Apparently I've been going about this the totally wrong way.
Ritz Crackers

Ardi-K: (I responded which generated the response below)

Ritz Crackers: That is really impressive. I have a ways to catch up ;) Ritz Crackers, you have Eternity to catch up.  I did most of my traveling when I was in my teens. I had interesting parents and they didnt mind if I just picked up and went. So I did. LOL. I started off just hitch hiking around America with my dog. Wow.  Teenage hitchhiker?  I'm pretty sure that's how most mass-murderers start out. I ventured our as I got a little older but when kids came it ended up being overnight camping in local campgrounds. I'm really hoping those are your own kids and not someone else's kids who were lured into your campground.  It has been an entirley new adventure but one that cant be beat.
So what do you do for a ------- company where a graduate degree is needed?  I can't tell if you are shocked that a Mormon woman would have a graduate degree.  Yes, I have two.  And yes, I use them.  But, Ritz Cracker, an MRS-degree is the only degree I really need.

Happy Camper, but not a Hitch Hiker,
Ardi-K

You Doin Tonight

Macaroni: Hello there
you doin tonight? Was that a "how YOU doin?" or a "What are you doing tonight?"  Because, either way, I'm absolutely amazing and I'm lucky enough to be spending my time reading an email from you.
Macaroni

I heart Guidos!!!
Ardi-K